Parasitology for civilians

Category: Alcoholism

  • Tinder is not the only fruit

    I’m 51 and single. If someone had told me this was in store for me when I was 16, I’d have felt very, very afraid. In fact, I’d have regarded future Callum as a weirdo and a failure. The kind of man who works as a janitor at a train station and has an unwholesome […]

  • ‘If this is hell, it looks a lot like Margate’

    I wrote this before I gave up the booze but I still like it. Every hardened drinker has had that morning when they’re lying in bed waiting for the call. Deep down you know that you’ve fucked up, but the details elude you. There are fragments of regret that kind of make sense, but the […]

  • The last time I got blootered

    It happened a while ago now. I’d been off the booze for months but got beaten up on a job, sustained three broken ribs and a busted up face, so I went straight to the shops for a promotional sized bottle of whisky and ordered a big bag of Banana Kush.  I sat in my […]